Genesis, The Worst Day Ever, Pt 2, "The Results", (Cue the Dramatic Music)

I think my posting title is a bit long, don't you?

If you're new to us here at ye ole' blog, we are going through a series, starting in Genesis, where we try to get an overall feel of the Bible story. We're not covering the whole of Genesis, but are trying to go from Genesis to Gospel. The faithful few of you who have actually read this blog maybe asking yourself the following:

Self: "You know what? We're supposed to be getting a framework for understanding the whole Bible, right?"
Yourself: "Yes"
Self: "We've been doing this for like 4 weeks and we're still in Genesis. I don't think we're ever going to finish!"
Yourself: "Be patient."
Self: "I don't know. I am thinking reading about a bucket of hair would be more interesting than this."

This guy didn't write my blog.

To which I say, I understand your frustration. It's slow going through the initial parts of Genesis, but trust me, there's a method to the madness here. Genesis is a foundation to understanding the Bible as a whole. If we don't rightly look at Genesis, then the way we understand the rest of the Bible will be all messed up. So yes, it's slow, but it's purposeful. I promise things will speed up eventually. Plus we're going through a spiritual topic, so that should make you feel good about yourself, right? When your friends ask you how you spent your free time you can tell them you read a really cool blog by a very interesting man about God and the Bible and they'll be like, "Whoa, you're cool."

When last we left our heroes, (Adam and Eve), they had just submitted to Satan's temptation and eaten the very fruit God told them not to. They trusted Satan over God, disrupted the creation order, and did what they weren't supposed to. Now we're going to get to open the Pandora's box and see the wonderful results, (sarcasm), of their choices...

Read Genesis 3 if you haven't already. We're looking specifically at Genesis 3:7-24.

Man's answer for shame

V7, "Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths." This is AFTER Adam and Eve had disobeyed God, which the Bible calls "sin". Let's briefly look back at Genesis 2:25, BEFORE they sinned and how they saw themselves. "And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed." So something has changed since sin. You may ask, so what? "Now they're wearing clothes. No one likes nudists anyways." Well the point here is bigger than that. Man and woman now know shame. They now know what it is like to do something wrong. They now know their need for "covering" from disobedience. Instead of living in open fellowship with God man and woman are now covering themselves up with leaves. Leaves! Man has been trying to cover up his imperfection and shame from this point on. Nowadays we use more sophisticated things like religious works, good deeds, sacrifice, giving, and rationalization. This is not a good start.
So God shows up, (v8-10), and comes to see man and woman, but they hide themselves from him because they know something is now wrong with them and the world. A few things to note here about God's interaction between man and woman:
- God calls to the man. Just as Satan distorted the creation order, (see previous blog), God works within the creation order, going to man.
- God is the one pursuing man and woman, not man pursuing God. Man hides from God and God pursues man. (This will be a running theme throughout the Bible). Being all knowing God obviously knew what happened to man and the woman, but he seeks them out in an effort to restore fellowship. He asks "Where are you? Who told you that you were naked?" As individuals who now live with the knowledge of good and evil, we instinctively know we are not right with God and seek to hide from him. The sin of man and woman has created false sense of the character of God. Man now thinks God is out to get him. Man no longer trusts God or rightly knows who HE is. So sin has distorted man's view of himself, (shame), and man's view of God. Man is trying to hide behind foliage and is hiding himself from his good and loving creator.
The effects of disobedience and unbelief that we see here in man and woman are traits that have been inherited by every man and woman since. Man has a messed up view of God, (we think he is evil, deceitful, made in our image, and must be appeased by works). Man has a messed up view of himself, (man thinks he is good and can cover his imperfections by his accomplishments or works). Every man, woman, and child since has inherited these traits. Whoopee! (more sarcasm) Let's continue...

V11-13, "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?' The man said, 'The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.' Then the Lord God said to the woman, 'What is this that you have done?' The woman said, 'The serpent deceived me, and I ate." 
God asks man what happened, (already knowing the truth). Man, having a chance to come clean and confess to God, chooses to do so, admitting his fault, admitting his lack of leadership, admitting to distrusting God...(what? That's not what happened? Oh, the man actually blamed the woman AND God? Boy that was stupid). Yes. Man blames the woman. "She did it." Man fails to take responsibility for his actions, fails to admit his disobedience to his creator, and instead blames the woman that he, the man, was given to care for, protect, and lead.

But that's not all Bob, show us what other stupid things Adam did!

Not only does Adam blame the woman, but he blames God. "This woman YOU GAVE ME". Man, a being who has not been around long, who was made from dust, decides to turn around and blame the almighty, eternal, all knowing, and all powerful God. This would be the equivalent of an ant attacking a A-1 Abrams tank. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Not only does Adam fail to take responsibility in his relationship with the woman, but he blames God. Think about how this plays out in your life. When something goes wrong, who do we usually blame? Others. Granted, there are some high quality people that take responsibility for their actions, but they are few and far between. Such behavior is cultivated INTO them and is not natural. (If you have children, you know what I mean). Adam blames the woman and then he blames God. Brilliant.

At this point God has every right to squash, (an actual theological term), the man into little bits. But the kindness of God persists. He turns to the woman and says, "What have you done?" The woman, to her credit, fesses up. The woman is the only one between the two people who actually takes responsibility for her actions. "I was deceived and I ate." Make a note here. When you get called on your irresponsibility and disobedience, just admit it. Blaming and hiding have never worked out well for anyone ever, (unless you're a politician in Washington. Yes, I went there).

The truth finally came out and now God announces the results of their disobedience. Here are the effects of sin's corruption in the world:

V14-20
The serpent/Satan:
- The serpent is cursed above all livestock and was confined to crawl on his belly for the rest of his days. Therefore we can conclude that the snakes we see in our day are different than they were originally created. What did they look like before? I don't know. But the snake received punishment from God for cooperating and being used by the devil.
- God promises to put enmity, (i.e. hatred), between the offspring of the serpent and the offspring of the woman. God is talking to the devil here. The offspring of the devil will be at war with the offspring of the woman. There is also the promise that the devil will bruise the heel, or injure, the offspring of the woman, while "he", the offspring of the woman, will bruise the head of Satan. Herein lies a promise of future salvation and redemption of man. This is also called the "protevangelium" or first gospel. This is the "seed" of the salvation story that will develop further in the Bible. The point here is that a savior shall come through the "seed" of woman who will destroy the "seed" of Satan.

The woman/relationships:
- The woman will have trouble giving birth and delivering children. She will have pain in labor. Pain in labor is meant to remind woman of the effects of sin. (We'll never know what it was like for a woman to give birth without sin in the world, but apparently it was a lot less unpleasant. I would put a picture here but well, you know).
v16 - "You will want to control your husband, but he will dominate you" (NetBible). "Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you", (NASB). The consequences of sin affect relationships with men and women. Men, who were to care for and protect women will now seek to rule over women in a cruel way. Unfortunately we know this is all too true in sinful men. They dominate cruelly with their strength and power. They become bullies. They become abusive in speech as well as physically. They are not caretakers, they are dictators.
Consequently, women are affected in their desires to control and manipulate their husbands. They will desire to be in control. We can all picture the "evil" woman in the movies who rules through manipulation and deceit. As a result of sin woman will no longer want to remain in a relationship of submission and service to her husband. Instead she will desire to take over and be in charge. Sin has ruined and will corrupt the relationships between men and women.

Adam/the world:
- The ground, which formerly was blessed by God as "good" would now be cursed. Man would no longer eat without toil and difficulty. The work of man would be difficult. The world would no longer work as God designed it. Man would survive and eat through difficulty and struggle. Any man or woman who has ever had a job in the real world knows this is true. Customers are difficult. People lie, cheat, and steal to get what they want. Bosses are jerks. People are not paid what they deserve. Managers and companies can be cruel dictators. Not only is work difficult, but the world is corrupted and broken. The world is not as God designed it. People get sick and die. People get cancer and Alzheimer's. Children are born with debilitating diseases. If you have ever thought that things are not supposed to be this way you were right. God planned the world to be good, healthy, and in fellowship with him. Now things are broken, corrupted, and dying.

Oh yeah! Well I hate the results of sin!

As sin entered the world, man blamed woman and blamed God. Sin will forevermore corrupt the relationships between man and women. Man's relationship with God is ruined. Man and woman now feel shame and try to "fix" things in whatever stupid way (leaves, religion, good works, money), they can imagine. The world will be broken and tainted. It's as if a cyanide had been dropped in a glass of pure water. Everything is now poisoned and ruined.

Tune in next time for another encouraging message from Travis! It's hard to find any sort of hope in this, is there? What we do find here are answers to some of the key questions that are asked. Where does evil come from? What is wrong with this world? What is wrong with mankind? The Bible answers these questions for us. The answer is not that man is uneducated, or that there is not enough money spent on the poor, or that men are too violent, (all of which have some validity to be sure). The answer is that man is corrupted by sin and his relationship with God and mankind has been broken. Man's need is not to have more things, be a better person, or be smarter. Man needs to be reconnected to his Creator. Man needs to deal with the problem of evil.

Next time we'll look at the end of Genesis 3 and the final results of man's sin. I promise there is hope in the future. We're just not at the future yet.

The Worst Day in Human History...Part 1 (Dum, DUM, DUMMMMMMMMMMMM)

World War Z came out recently and it's apparently about the end of the world[i]. People get a virus that turns them into zombies and the zombie people try to eat/kill/infect every other person on the planet. (Apparently of all the people groups in the world, zombies are the most intolerant). Zombies or no zombies, I'm sure you've all seen a movie, read a book, or watched a television show about the end of the world. The scene is dramatic, people are sick or dying or both, everyone is crying, the music is compelling, and the feeling conveyed is that this is the worst possible moment of all time. We've all heard about or seen movies about the end of the world and we're always made to feel like it's the worst point ever in history where everything is ruined, destroyed, and hopeless. Usually that involves zombies, nuclear missiles, war, famine, bullets, blood, and explosions. Well I wanted to throw a wrench into everyone's apocalyptic thinking. I think the worst moment in human history did not involve zombies, Nazis, nuclear bombs, or alien war lords who wanted to take over earth. I submit the worst day in human history happened in a garden, and simply involved a man, a woman, and a snake. 

First we’re going to look at what happened in Genesis 3. Then we’ll look at the results of what happened, (next blog).

Genesis 3 Click the link to read the passage. Please read it if you haven't. It's not that long and this blog isn't going anywhere, (unless of course I get eaten by a zombie in the next 5 minutes). 

Quick Recap: God makes creation and it's all good. God makes man, which is good, but man needs a corresponding helper, so God makes woman, which is AWESOME. God looks over all creation and says, "It is VERY GOOD." God also told man to tend the garden, eat whatever fruit he wanted, "but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die,” (Genesis 2:17). So God makes a good world, gives man and woman everything they need and gives them only one command to follow. So everything is groovy. If man can just obey God in this one matter, he won't die. Seems easy enough, right? Well...

3:1 "Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made,"[ii]

Keeping in mind that Satan wants to destroy and corrupt what God has made, we look at what happens.

Courtesty the bricktestament.com

3:1-4, "He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?”  And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’”  

Several things here:

1.      Why wasn't Eve disturbed by a talking snake? I’m just saying it’s weird.

2.      The snake approaches Eve. This is subtle, but important. God has made Adam as his representative ruler on earth. Man was given the task of tending and keeping the garden. Adam was the one given the authority to name all the animals of creation. It was to Adam who God gave a helper, (Eve), not the other way around. I’m not on a male power trip here, I trying to illustrate the order and structure God had put in creation. Satan goes to Eve instead of Adam, subtly going against God’s created order. If Satan had any issues with God’s care of his creation he should have gone to God first, or Adam second. The created order was God>Adam>Eve, and Satan wasn't in the picture. So now Satan comes along and the order is Satan>Eve>Adam, with God out of the picture. As a friend of mine would say, “This is bad news bears”.

3.      Satan directly challenges the validity of what God had said. “Did God actually say?” At the outset the devil is challenging the authority and truthfulness of God’s word. He will continue to use this tactic throughout history, both from outside God’s people and even from within. I would venture to say there is no other book than the Bible that has been so challenged, vilified, and disputed throughout all history.

4.      Eve, apparently not disturbed by the talking snake, responds by adding to God’s commandment. Eve tells the serpent that not only can they not eat from the tree “in the midst of the garden”, but they also can’t even touch it. Thus begins the creation of humanistic religious standards. If you’re reading at home, throw your hands in the air and say, ‘Oh crap!’ Eve, (not to pick on women, b/c men do it just as much or more), added to God’s stated word/command. She created for herself rules that God never mentioned and man has been doing it ever since. Now if you research any religious system you will find a list of commands a mile high and just as wide. Even Judaism and Christianity, which originate in the Bible, find themselves corrupted by adding on of commands and standards of what it means to be spiritual and close to God.

Things are not starting off well here. Unfortunately, they’re about to get worse…

“But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” (v4)

The devil starts out challenging the God’s order structure in creation, and then subtly challenges the truth of God’s given commandment, and then he gets Eve to add on to what God had said. So far, he’s batting 3-3. Now he goes for the home run. He straight out disputes the truth of God and challenges God’s character. He says “You won’t die”. In other words, God is lying to you. God has told you something and it is not true. The implication is that God cannot be trusted. Secondly, he tells Eve that if she eats of the fruit of this tree, not only will she not die, but she will be like God. What’s the implication here? It is that God is not only lying, but that he is not good. God, according to Satan, is holding out on you. He doesn't want what is best for you. He doesn't want you to be happy. He is a liar and he is unloving. Interestingly enough, Satan is the one who is a liar and who is hateful, not God. Now, as we looked at earlier, with the order structure, Eve trusts and obeys Satan, who is seeking her destruction, instead of trusting and obeying God, who made her, loves her, and knows what is best for her.[iii]

“So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.”

Eve, now rejecting what God has said and trusting the serpent/devil, sees the following:

1.      The fruit is good.

2.      The fruit looks good.

3.      The tree will make me wise, (or like God, according to Satan).

Let’s compare this with a Christian teacher named John, also one of Jesus’ closest friends on earth, and what he had to say about temptation some 4,000 years later in 1 John 2:16-17:

“For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world.  And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”

1.      The desires of the flesh – Eve saw the tree was good, (Lust).

2.      The desires of the eyes – The tree was a delight to the eyes, (Greed).

3.      The pride of life – Eve saw the tree, (she thought), would make her wise, (Pride)

Apparently the devil hasn't changed his tactics because they have worked so well throughout history.

This guy also didn't listen.

Poor Eve. She’s been getting herself into some trouble here. If only there was someone who could step in and provide wise and loving leadership in this situation. If only there was some sort of friend who also knew of God’s commands and could help Eve stand strong against temptation. If only…Oh wait, there’s Adam, he’ll sort it out. Adam, tell that woman to stop talking to that snake and get away from that tree. Adam, what are you doing? Why are you messing with that fruit? Put it down! Don’t eat it? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So here not only is there a failure on the woman’s part, but the man was apparently there the whole time and failed to provide loving and helpful leadership. Adam should have ripped that snake’s head off and stood up for God’s truth. He should have confronted the snake on his lies. He should have told Eve, “Listen, I know this all sounds good, but God is good, he loves us, and he knows what is best for us. We need to listed to and trust God.” But what did Adam do, he kept his mouth shut, allowed the serpent to speak, and listened to his wife when she gave him the forbidden fruit to eat. Absolutely wonderful, (sarcasm).

What are the lessons to be learned here?

1.      I don’t care how many cartoons you've seen, NEVER, EVER talk to snakes.

2.      Don’t add to what God has said. Men get themselves and others in trouble when they start adding commandments or rules that God didn't provide.

3.      The created order was distorted by Satan and he has kept it up ever since. Satan is seeking to distort the image of man.

4.      Satan is seeking to distort the image of God by lying about his character and his truthfulness.

5.      God did not fail man. Man failed God. God had given one command to obey and simply asked to be trusted, but man failed. (Warning: this will be a running theme).

Next time: The results, but not in a 'who won the prize' kind of way, more like a "your cholesterol results are in and we think you should be hospitalized" sort of way.

---

[i] Personally I’m more excited about The Wolverine.

[ii] This blog isn't big enough to do a full out explanation of the serpent, but there is a general agreement that Satan had possessed or was using this particular snake to do his bidding. I promise to do a follow up blog on angels and Satan, but for now let's just run with the premise that snake = Satan/the devil. Satan, if you don't know, was a fallen angel who attempted to rule over heaven in God's place. God, being God, smites him and kicks him out of heaven. Satan spends the rest of eternity trying to destroy God and his creation. 

[iii] The lesson here as always: If you have to choose between trusting God and something else, especially a snake, choose God. 

Man gets Woman and he's very happy about it.

Mmmmmmm, Krisy Kreme.

So last week we met my imaginary producer and, more importantly, talked about the importance of the Bible. Sadly, I was informed by one of my readers, that Charlton Heston and Moses are not one and same persons. I kind of knew this was true, but to hear it confirmed was a hard blow to my emotional psyche. It took me several donuts to get over this information. Nevertheless, I will carry on...somehow. 

This blog series, which is rapidly rising in popularity among the blogosphere, (now only slightly behind the "Why I love my Curly Hair" blog), is intended to show you, oh faithful reader, the overall story of the Bible. Ergo, my writing comes from the belief in the trustworthiness and inerrancy, (lack of error), of the Bible itself. That being said, I now turn to God creating man and more importantly, (if you're a guy), God creating woman. If you're reading along, I'd read through Genesis 2 at this point. It's the first book of the Bible, second chapter. (I'll pause now while you read). 

(Still waiting). 

(Geez, what's wrong with you?)

(Ready now? Good).

So God creates man out of the dust of the ground and breathes into him the breath of life. Pretty cool, huh? I know we kind of covered this a few weeks ago, but there are a few other things worth pointing out here: 

1) Man is not the center of the Bible story, God is. We live in a culture that puts man in the center of all things, that values man as the most important thing in creation. However, there's a problem with that sort of thinking. Man is made from the dust and dies. God is eternal. Man has to grow, learn, develop, eat, sleep, and protect himself from the elements. God knows all things, is all-powerful, needs no food, needs to sleep, needs no protection, and has no rival. God is the creator. Man is created. Man has to be potty trained. God...not so much. Man is subject to disease, decay, and death. God is immortal and eternal. He has no beginning and no end. So um...God wins on that one.
(If you're a very self absorbed and prideful person, you probably find this point to be a real downer. Sorry). 


Side note: Man was not made because God was lonely. There is no deficiency in God. There is no indication here or anywhere else in the Bible to suggest some social inadequacy, loneliness, or boredom on the Lord's part. God has existed eternally within the personhood of the Trinity. I don't want to get ahead of where we are in the Bible, but it is an important point to make. The Creator of all life needs nothing from men, does not get bored, and does not get lonely. This means we do not have a God who is pitiful, needy, or lacking. (No one can stand those people anyways). We worship God who is completely satisfied in himself, who has no needs, and is worthy of our praise.

2) On the other hand, man does have incredible greatness and significance based on his relationship before his Creator. God breathed life into man. There is no other creature that can say the same. God gave commands to man and gave him a job to do. No other creature was given specific work and commands like man. Only man was given a command of what to do and not to do. Man was also given the privilege to name all the creatures of the earth, thereby putting him in a position of authority and lordship over the created world. Man IS significant, but only as he stays in the right position before his Creator. When man steps out of that correct position, (as unfortunately we'll see very soon), everything goes wrong. When man doesn't listen to God and stay within the bounds provided by Him for his good and protection then he gets in big trouble, both with the Lord and with himself. (Pay attention to that last sentence as it will come up again and again throughout the rest of the Bible).

So God makes man, puts him in the garden, and gives him a job to do. Also, there was given a consequence for disobedience = death. There are no laws to obey, no complex structure to follow, no dietary commands to keep. Man has one clear command to follow: Don't eat from that tree. The consequences could hardly be clearer. If you eat from one specific tree you will die. God wanted man to obey him and trust him in this one thing. We'll get to this later in chapter 3, but unfortunately, if you have or ever dealt with children, you know that telling them what they CAN'T do never ends well.

There is a problem in the created world at this point. There is something that was "not good". And you say, 'How can that be?' Everything God made was good. He says so. God looked over creation and said, "It was very good". So how can we have something in God's created world that is not good? You wonder if there is some inadequacy with God so that he was unable to meet a need in man's life? No, there is nothing in Genesis 1 that would lead you to think God was inadequate some way. What then? Man, as created, is not made to be alone. Man needs fellowship. Man needs a companion and a helper. And so we have the creation of woman, or as Mike Myers said in So I Married an Axe Murderer, "Whoa-Man". If you're reading this blog and you're a man, let's stop a moment and say "Hallelujah" that God made women. (I'm serious).

HALLELUJAH!!!

(I'd put in a picture here of a beautiful woman, but if I Googled "beautiful woman" I'd probably get some sort of pornography, which isn't cool. I also wanted to put a picture of my wife up, but she really doesn't want to be seen by the millions, (ahem), who read my blog). 

So what's the problem? There is not a helper "suitable for", "corresponding to", "fit for", "a helper, his compliment" for Adam, (the quotations are from different translations). There wasn't found a being who matched up with Adam, like peanut butter matches up with jelly. There was no "fit" for Adam. Adam needed a helper who would compliment and match up to him. He needed someone different, yet similar enough to correspond to who he was. The problem is there was nothing and no one in creation at this time who "fit" Adam. 

Therefore God, being good, loving, wise, and kind, since there is no compliment to Adam, makes one for him. God puts Adam to sleep and takes a rib from his side and from the rib he makes Eve. Then, (v22), God brings the woman to the man. Can you imagine the first man meeting the first woman for the very first time? How cool! Adam apparently thought it was pretty cool too because he responds with praise and rejoicing. 

"This one, at last, is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh;

this one will be called “woman,” for she was taken from man," (V23).

The "at last" here in the verse is significant. The man had looked at everything in creation and found nothing that was suitable, nothing that was a good fit with him. But now, WOMAN! Here he sees a match. Here he sees someone that is like him, yet unlike him. Here is someone who will be a good fit and correspond to who he is as a man. Adam basically responds like this. 

Here we see the incredible significance of the sexes. Each sex is unique and special before God. There is also an order to creation. God created man first, then the woman. This implies no superiority in being, but it does imply a significance in order before God. It was man who was made first, given the command to tend the garden, and given the responsibility of naming the animals of creation. It was women who was made second and made as a helpmate to correspond to the man. God has established and order in creation, just as there is an order in a dance, numbers, and the alphabet. There is no superiority in the the order, but there is order and authority. (Obviously a divisive subject, but the challenge as always is to make sure we're Biblical in our thinking).

Finally, at the end of chapter 2, we see the first marriage before God between man and woman. God has created the woman and brought her to the man. Man is VERY excited to see the woman and all of her...womanness, (Curves, Holla!). Now the writer notes how this sets a precedent for every future marriage between man and woman. 

"Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh," (V24). Marriage then, was instituted in creation, by God. It was made by God at the very beginning and it is meant to reflect the image of God and be something wonderful. Granted, it may not always be that way, but it is what God intended. Marriage is meant, by God, to be something very unique, sacred, and special. There is meant to be a oneness between man and woman. It is so much more sacred and holy than our society portrays it in movies, television, and magazines. It is a divine creation that is intended to glorify and honor God. Pretty cool, huh?

I'm sure Eve looked much better than these um, women

 
Alright! Thanks for sticking with this long blog. Tune in next time where man and woman screw everything up!

A random poem that has no relation to anyone in my house whatsoever

Annie Lentz, who makes no sense.

Annie Lentz, makes no sense, she wakes up every night.
Annie wants a blanket, a song, a hug, or her light is just too bright.
She wants a drink of water, because she is so thirsty,
or she needs some help because her pillow isn't fluffy.
She wants another song or one more hug and kiss,
all the while her parents think, "I've HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!"

Annie goes to bed at 8, then wakes up at 8:30,
she says she cannot sleep because her pillow's dirty.
Her pillowcase is replaced and everything is fine,
until the shadows in her room wake her up at nine.
After assuring Annie she is safe and the shadows are okay,
Annie is put back into bed, where she is told to stay.
Everything goes smoothly, until about 9:30,
when Annie comes out of her room because her finger's hurting.
A kiss upon her finger sends Annie to bed again,
but oh wait, even though it's late, Annie's up at 10.
Now she's all upset and she shares the truth,
That she can't possibly go to bed because she misses you.
You miss her too, you say, while silently grinding your teeth,
but she is going to get in big trouble if she doesn't go to sleep.
At last she stays in her bed, and it is now 11,
You go to sleep yourself and set the alarm clock for 7.
But at 2:35 am Annie's scream reaches your head,
Annie really quite sorry, but she has wet the bed.
So with fresh sheets and a new blanket, everything's alright,
you'd be so very happy if she'd make it through the night.
But oh no, at 4:00, Annie's up it seems,
she needs your help because she's had a very bad dream.
So Annie Lentz, who makes no sense, crawls into your bed,
where she giggles and wiggles and accidentally kicks your head.
You finally go back to sleep until 6:24,
when Annie wakes you up again with her very loud snores.
And so, tired and exhausted, you arise to start the day,
hoping that you'll find the strength to make it through some way.
But before you leave the house, thinking of all you have to do,
Annie smiles, hugs your neck, and says "I love you."

I wish Annie Lentz, would make some sense, and somehow sleep through the night,
But since she loves me so very much, I guess I'll be alright.

The Bible, Charlton Heston, and arguing with my imaginary staff

 If you've been reading ye ole' blog for the last couple of weeks then you know I've been attempting to start at the beginning of the Bible in an attempt to lay a foundation for understanding the Bible as a whole. I want to lay the groundwork for my readers to understand the story of the Bible, which is God's Word. I want to try and go from the very beginning, at Genesis 1:1, to the Gospel accounts of Jesus. It will be a difficult task, but I am being well paid...(INTERRUPTION)

Me: What?

Imaginary producer guy: You're not being paid. 

Me: Why not? 

Imaginary producer guy: Because you're doing it out of the good will of your heart, etc, and you want some excuse to combine your journalism and Bible degrees, which you are otherwise not using. 

Me: But there's no money in it?
Producer: No. 

Me: You're sure?
Producer (annoyed): Yes.

Me: Yes, there's money, or 'yes' you're sure there's no money. 

Producer (more annoyed): Yes, I'm sure there's no money. You're so poor you're making your producer up. 

Me: Oh. Right.

Anyways, so out of the goodness of my heart, I'm trying to lay the groundwork for understanding the Bible story.[i] I’ve already completed two blogs on the subject. But I started thinking that it would be good if I explained where I am coming from when I teach/write/blog. So what I’m going to do is explain a bit about the Bible itself and where it came from. This is not the place for an all-out debate about the Bible. I’m not trying to skirt the issue, but there are other, smarter men who have already done this. My goal is to teach through the core story of the Bible and I am doing that on the basis of certain beliefs. You don’t have to agree with me, but I do want you to understand where I’m coming from.

I believe the Bible was written by God, through 40 men, over 1600 years of history. The authors of the books of the Bible were all Jewish but one, (Luke was a Gentile, or a non-Jew). The authors were incredibly diverse in background, but unified in its truth and message. It was written by fishermen, nomads, shepherds, priests, physicians, politicians, warriors, kings, prophets, the young and old, the educated and uneducated. I believe the Bible is without error and was sovereignly and purposefully created by God throughout history to reveal to man the truth about God, man, the world, evil, and man’s ultimate redemption by God. This is the basis for the blog you’re reading.
                           

So first off, how did we get the Bible? Jews, throughout their history, were given the books of the Bible by God. He either spoke to certain men, (Moses/Charlton Heston)[ii], telling them what to write, revealed the truth through visions and dreams to others, or so worked through men as they wrote and spoke that their words were exactly what he planned to say. Here’s how Paul and Peter, two messengers and preachers immediately after Christ, explained the Scriptures.

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness,” (2 Timothy 3:16) (Paul)

“knowing this first of all, that no prophecy of Scripture comes from someone's own interpretation. For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit,” (2 Peter 1:20-21).

John Stott, a really smart Christian pastor/theologian/writer/apologist once wrote:

“Out of whose mouth did Scripture come, then? God’s or man’s? The only biblical answer is ‘both’. Indeed, God spoke through the human authors in such a way that his words were simultaneously their words, and their words were simultaneously his. This is the double authorship of the Bible. Scripture is equally the Word of God and the words of human beings. Better, it is the Word of God through the words of human beings.”[iii]

But then, you may ask, “how did we get the present day Bible from however many thousands of years ago, (Moses/Charlton Heston), to our present day? If I tell a friend something, he has a hard enough time telling another person what I originally told him without distorting what I said in one way or another. How do we know the message of the Bible hasn’t been distorted and the meaning lost over the last 6,000 years? How do we know the Bible is trustworthy?” Good question. Here are my answers:

1. The Jews throughout history were extremely laborious about how they copied the transcripts of the Bible writings. Here I’ll quote from the book Firm Foundations, which is quoting from the Illustrated Bible Dictionary,

“They (the Jews) used every imaginable safeguard, no matter how cumbersome or laborious, to ensure the accurate transmission of the text. The number of letters in a book was counted and its middle letter was given. Similarly with the words, and again the middle word of the book was noted…”[iv]

I follow this up with the story of the Dead Sea scrolls, also quoted in Mcllwain’s book. In 1947, a shepherd near Jerusalem threw a rock into a local cave and heard the sound of pottery breaking. He investigated and found the cave was full of pottery holding ancient scrolls. It was later discovered that these scrolls contained fragments of ancient Biblical and non-Biblical writings. Scholars who compared the most recent manuscripts of the Bible, which were written in 900 A.D., with the Biblical writings among the scrolls, (written in the second or third centuries), found no significant differences between the texts. Think about that, a difference in transcripts over several centuries and no discernible differences found![v]

2. Jesus viewed the Bible as inerrant, trustworthy, and true. I could try and say it better than Josh McDowell, but either I can’t or I’m just lazy. Either way, he says it pretty well here.

3. God is in total control. This may be circular logic, but then again, maybe I’m just making really good sense here. Follow me on this. If God is in complete control of the universe and he wanted to make sure he communicated exactly and specifically with the human race the truth about life, marriage, sexuality, goodness, righteousness, love, peace, wisdom, money, and so on, don’t you think he would take pains to ensure this knowledge and information was recorded accurately?

4. The Bible has consistently been proven to be accurate on matters of history and prophecy, which has been verified by archeological finds throughout time. (See also any of the Indiana Jones movies).

Look, I’m not saying there are not some things in the Bible that aren’t really hard to understand and explain. I’m not saying there aren’t difficult matters within the Bible that make you scratch your head or make you angry. I’m not saying you even have to agree with me about the Bible or about God. I am saying that for the purposes of this blog we, (I say ‘we’ to include myself and my imaginary producer), will be working/writing on the belief that the Bible is true and without error. I wanted to lay that groundwork before we got too far into the writing. I apologize for the rather tedious nature of this blog posting, but it had to be done. If you have any questions or concerns, please write my producer. 

Stay tuned for the next blog where I'll write more about Genesis and introduce you to my fake secretary, Lolita. But not that guy down there.

---

[i] I'm basing a good bit of my thinking off "Firm Foundations: Creation to Christ" by Trevor McIlwain. The book is a very large book that breaks down the Biblical story in 52 lessons. Full disclosure: I'm 99.5% certain he has done a better job than I will, so if you'd like to read it, check out Amazon.com. (He even probably had enough money for a non-imaginary producer).

[ii] If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then go rent the Ten Commandments. Other Charlton Heston movies are good too, but not necessarily related to the Bible. I also like Jaws, which isn’t really Biblical, nor does it include Charlton Heston, but it is about a large shark and has a great soundtrack. But I digress…

[iii] John Stott, The Contemporary Christian (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 1992), 168-69

[iv] Firm Foundations, Creation to Christ, Trever Mcllwain. He lists The Illustrated Bible Dictionary, part 3, J.D. Douglas. And yes, I am too lazy to figure out the right way to properly cite my sources.

[v] Another good quote someone smarter than me said, “Klein, Blomberg, and Hubbard, Biblical Interpretation, 72, conclude: ‘Estimates suggest that at least 97 percent, if not more, of the original New Testament can be reconstructed from the existing manuscripts beyond any measure of doubt. The percentage for the Old Testament is lower, perhaps only about 90 percent.” Quoted from J. Scott Duvall and J. Daniel Hays, Grasping God’s Word.